Delusions. Breath.

The Cop asked me to look at his last urdhva dhanurasana. I did. Made comments about things to do, things to change, etc. Should have been more thoughtful, perhaps. About where he was coming from. Ambition? Pride? Frustration?

My answer didn’t seem to be what he was looking for. I felt sorry for a moment but went back to practice.

Was tempted to say something about how little one can get back from yoga, in terms of clear praise (from teachers), clear progress (from the system), clear direction (from the self). Of course, all of this is true and NOT true.

So instead of saying anything, I just shut up.

Because in the end, all of it would dissolve in the next breath.

I’m not quite sure if yoga is going for the same thing as zazen, but if I am in the breath (one by one, not looking forward, not looking back) everything melts with each breath.

The Cop’s been really getting stronger on the breath, and letting our interaction melt seemed more important than trying to clarify it.

How can we think words clarify?

How can we think point-of-view is the be-all, end-all?

What strange delusions.

Before practice, I visited Owl’s blog, where her entry pointed, humorously, at the observer effect.

Thanks for that little boost to my subconscious, Owl.

Urdhva dhanurasana (for me) was interesting after my nice breath-conscious practice. I *strive* so hard with UD. Muscle, muscle, muscle.

After the first one, I lay on my mat and breathed, then set up for the second. Felt how tense my quads got, how tense my upper back as I set my hands. How my mind buckled down to think of all the things I think I need to think about.

I relaxed back down. Shook my arms and legs, thought about being gawky and soft and goofily articulated through my joints. Thought about just turning myself inside-out, flipping the heart chakra (which I involute) out.

MUCH easier to go up.

Letting go of my ideas about my own strength subtracted a good bit of gravity.


12 Responses

  1. Just tell him to do another set of 3 and promise him that the more you do the easier they get!

    (I don’t know if it’s true, but at least I won’t be alone when I’m cursing my 6th UD at approximately 6:15 am eastern time!)


  2. How can we think words clarify?

    How can we think point-of-view is the be-all, end-all?

    this speaks so much to what i was asking you about the other day. i try so hard to talk myself out of certain negative emotions, to justify or clarify, or try to create another point of view, when really the best thing i think would be to breathe and let it dissolve.
    thanks 🙂

  3. I wanted her to watch my THIRD one … not make me do a FOURTH. I was just being a diva.

  4. You weren’t being a diva. You were positing a philosophical conundrum. 😉

  5. You also found the philosophical conundrum in *my* morning snark.

    Nice, this benefit-of-the-doubt action, eh Cop?

    BTW, you have the fastest lotus in the west, Sir. One–not me!–might speculate about past lives…

  6. Oooh, maybe I’ll start a past life meme! LOL!

    Please tell me all the good yogi(ni)s would eschew the obvious ones: Cleopatra, Attila the Hun, etc…

    The meme will have to have a “this can be taken metaphorically” clause.

  7. Can I be Sor Juana Ines de the Cruz?

    I’ve come a long way since that drama-queen incarnation, but may have deteriorated morally….

  8. I don’t know how metaphorical it would be, but I think I’d have to past-life-meme myself as Ramtha.

  9. *Can* you be?

    Seems as if you *could* have… 🙂

  10. But is Ramtha dead?

    Are you already Ramtha?

    Am I Ramtha?

    About Sor Juana, I guess I was thinking of the multiplayer online gaming version of past lives. Wonder how she would interact with your haiku-master past self?

    (I might also want to call dibs on the rebel-priest writing liberation theology in some Latin American highland or a teenager in Paris in ’68–unless Patrick wants either of those.)

    This should definitely be a meme!

  11. I’m pretty sure Ramtha is dead, if in fact he was ever alive. He has a pretty good gig right now — probably much better than he had in his own lifetime. J.Z. does all the legwork — collecting all the fees and depositing them in the bank, and such — and all Ramtha has to do is lay around on his ectoplasmic chais lounge and inform J.Z. what bits of wisdom she should relate to the masses. I want his job.

  12. You can be Ramtha, but I want to be Seth.

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