State of the state

This morning I had no energy for regular practice. This is a loaded issue for me. It’s much easier when I just follow the rules of Ashtanga. All practice, all the time 😉

I did the backbending research sequence I made up for myself a few months ago. It really is working, though not because of any particular magic in my sequence. It’s working because any persistent backbending would affect anyone, even a stiff-backed gal like myself.

The whole time, though, I felt rather criminal. Argh. Save me from my fundamentalist nature. I either want to rebel entirely or follow the rules to the letter. Not such great mental flexibility. All I can do is chalk this up to another learning experience. I did a different kind of practice today. Does that mean I need to decide to never do that again, to always do it, etc., etc., etc.?

I worry about messing up my discipline, which is usually quite strong. I worry about my propensity for discipline, which might be a kind of self-inflicted fascism.

In the meantime, backbending felt very good. A lot of the things I do in the self-made sequence used to hurt like a motherf***er. This morning, nope, no pain. I even set up a milk crate and did some of the stuff Tim illustrated on his blog.

Actually, while we’re talking about it, take a look at the second picture down on Tim’s entry today. The arms overhead, hands grasping elbows? Okay, this is my fatal flaw arm position. I totally suck at it. See how Tim’s elbows are on the floor? Not mine. If I grab my elbows, my arms poke pretty straight up. I think it’s my triceps that are way too tight? And shoulders, of course. Anyone with suggestions on loosening the arms/shoulders to gain more flexibility for that sort of move? It’s crucial to kapotasana, I know. Which is a long ways off for me, but I might want to get a move on, arm/shoulder-wise, if I can find some useful remedial poses.

Okay, the other thing lately is lightness. As in, I’m light. There’s a place where weight and strength are in perfect alignment, and somehow my set point seems to be readjusting. From backbends, possibly? I lost some weight (not purposefully) and whereas I can usually just put on a couple pounds if I feel I am losing strength, in this case, it’s just not coming back on. It’s a little strange, because I am usually freakishly stable, weight-wise. All of a sudden, though, it seems like my set point has gone down a bit and I feel like I have a new body. Actually, now that I think about it, a more open-to-backbending body. Which is nice. But a less excess-energy body, too. I mean, to put this all in perspective, we’re only talking a few pounds. Still, though, it seems like something is different. Just can’t quite articulate what that is.


One Response

  1. My elbows?

    I hired a body double 😉

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